THIS BLOG IS MY BLOG. THIS BLOG IS MY BLOG. Welcome to the Home of Hyperopia.: On Firsts - Part 1

Thursday, March 16, 2006

On Firsts - Part 1


First day in a new office. First day in a new job. First day with a new set of co-workers. First time I've ever worked in a place that had Snickers Ice Cream Bars in the corporate freezer.

Things could certainly be worse .......

18 Comments:

Blogger FLAMINGO1 said...

Wow...and all we have is money.

6:43 PM, March 16, 2006  
Blogger Complete Game said...

Free popcorn aint worth gooseshit on a pumphandle compared to that.

Damn, oil and fart is lucrative.

9:26 AM, March 17, 2006  
Blogger The Velvet Fog said...

Easy there big fella.
I don't want to see you on Biggest Loser any time soon.

Them bulls will hook ya.

10:12 AM, March 17, 2006  
Blogger Chris said...

New job? Please advise.

8:30 AM, March 20, 2006  
Blogger The Velvet Fog said...

Seems like maybe they should invest in computers so you could update your blog, rather than junk-food. But then, I am just a cave-man. Your ways scare and confuse me.

10:02 AM, March 20, 2006  
Blogger The Velvet Fog said...

I think he migrated to Seguin, or somewhere over in there, married a fat widow and had a passel of offspring. You ought to have done the same, but here you are in Montana.

1:14 PM, March 21, 2006  
Blogger The Velvet Fog said...

I won't tolerate vanity in a man, though I will in a woman. If I had gone north in my youth I might have got to be a mountain man, but I took to riverboating instead. The whores on them riverboats in my day barely wore enough clothes to pad a crutch.

1:15 PM, March 21, 2006  
Blogger The Velvet Fog said...

Let's go on for a day or two more. We aint struck the Milk River yet.

Does it run milk?

Now think a minute, Pea, how could it run milk when there ain't no cows up here yet?

Why did they call it the Milk, then? Milk is milk.

1:17 PM, March 21, 2006  
Blogger The Velvet Fog said...

You can't have this leg, and if you're thinking of overpowering me you have to calculate on losing about half the town. I can shoot straight when I'm drunk, too.

2:20 PM, March 21, 2006  
Blogger The Velvet Fog said...

I guess you don't care much for stubborn customers, do you?

No, they irk me, you might have lived, but now you'll die. Your reasoning escapes me.

Well, I'll pay your bill right now, my reasoning ain't your concern.

2:22 PM, March 21, 2006  
Blogger The Velvet Fog said...

You don't like to do nothing but sit on the porch and drink whiskey anyway. It don't take legs to do that.

No, I also like to walk around to the springhouse once in a while, to see if my jug's cooled proper, or I might want to kick a pig if one aggravates me.

2:26 PM, March 21, 2006  
Blogger The Velvet Fog said...

Was you ever been threatened by a woman Gus?

No, not what you'd call threatened, I was hit with a stove lide once or twice.

Why?

Why, no reason, if you live with Mexicans you can expect to eat beans, sooner or later.

Who said anything about Mexicans?

You always was slow to see the point, Jake. If you fool with women you'll get hit by a stove lid, sooner or later, whereas if you live with Mexicans you have to expect beans in your diet.

2:31 PM, March 21, 2006  
Blogger The Velvet Fog said...

You'd be better off if you could just enjoy a poke once in a while, life in San Francisco is still just life. If you want one thing too much it's likely to be a disappointment. The healthy way is to learn to like the everyday things, like soft beds and buttermilk-and feisty gentlemen.

2:33 PM, March 21, 2006  
Blogger The Velvet Fog said...

These goddamn sodbusters, I hate their guts and livers.

Well, that's fine Dan, They're dead enough.

No they ain't, a goddamn sodbuster can never be dead enough to suit me.

2:40 PM, March 21, 2006  
Blogger The Velvet Fog said...

Would you like to shoot him, Jake?
I've known him all my life.

I wouldn't care to.

Well damn, nobody's much help.

2:41 PM, March 21, 2006  
Blogger The Velvet Fog said...

I'll be glad to get to Dodge, I'd like a bath and a whore. And a good barber to shave me. There's a barber there named Sandy that I fancy, if nobody ain't shot him.

You'll know tomorrow, I guess. I've never liked barbers myself.

Dan don't even like whores. Dan's hard to please.

2:51 PM, March 21, 2006  
Blogger ac said...

I wanna snickers ice cream plese !!!!!!!!!!

3:30 PM, March 24, 2006  
Blogger garrett said...

i done et 'em all

4:06 PM, March 24, 2006  

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