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Wednesday, November 30, 2005

It Wasn't a Fly In My Soup ...

. . . but this might actually be even worse. And I shouldn't bother you kind folks about it, but I need to. I am having some difficulty moving past the event. And maybe sharing will help.

Yesterday, my assistant brought me a grilled chicken sandwich yesterday from a mesquite grill restaurant near our offices. The sandwich included lettuce, tomatoes, and mayonnaise. I didn't want the lettuce, tomotoes, or mayonnaise. (This particular sandwich I like with only about 40 dill pickle slices. No condiments.)

So I opened the sandwich and started to scrape off the mayo and pick off the lettuce and the tomatoes. When I lifted up the first layer of lettuce, I saw that the restaurant had also included a dead mosquito (see picture) in my sandwich. At first glance, I was fairly repulsed. But I was pretty hungry. So I just tried to put it out of my mind. I finished throwing away the lettuce and the tomatoes, and I finished scraping off the mayonnaise. Then I ate the sandwich. Well, most of it, anyway. When I was about 80% done eating it I lost control of my brain. I could no longer repress the memory of having seen a dead mosquito in the food I was eating. So I couldn't finish the sandwich. And I couldn't eat the fries either. Then I started to feel a little sick to my stomach. I still do feel a bit queasy, just typing these words.

It wasn't a fly in my soup, it was a mosquito in my sandwich.




Blogger The Velvet Fog said...

It is protein. Quit being a baby.
Do you think famous Texan Sam Houston would have whined about a little mosquito? He'd have asked for more. What would Agustus McRae say about you representing his state? I shudder to think what one Woodrow F. Call would do to you. Eastern tenderfoot sumbitch.

The rest of you little shits is only worth a hunnert and ten, but I'll take it.

10:30 AM, November 30, 2005  
Blogger FLAMINGO1 said...

C'mon Garrett, stop being a sissy. That little mosquito didn't even look like it was half filled with someone else's blood.

10:40 AM, November 30, 2005  
Blogger PDD said...

... blood contaminated with the HIV virus...

11:09 AM, November 30, 2005  
Blogger garrett said...

To PDD's point, I am just glad that I didn't want the lettuce. Otherwise I would've chomped it right up, I suspect.

11:14 AM, November 30, 2005  
Blogger PDD said...

There would be more than just the mosquito in the lettuce. Perhaps a little clean green bug that was powerful enough to counteract the contaminated blood, which brings you to the same place as you are right now.

12:54 PM, November 30, 2005  
Blogger Cooter said...

The sign said MOSQUITO Grill, not Mesquite Grill.

Goot goot goot!

1:50 PM, November 30, 2005  
Blogger Dongley Shlongford said...

I eat the p**y I eat the a** hole,
I eat every mother f**king thing.

1:52 PM, November 30, 2005  
Blogger Erin O'Brien said...

garret, now listen up. You needed to take the picture of the bug while it was still ON the sandwich, embedded in mayo. Get it right next time.

1:58 PM, November 30, 2005  
Blogger NowhereGirl said...

YUCK! I'm with you Garrett!

"That little mosquito didn't even look like it was half filled with someone else's blood. "

Thanks for the visual, Flamingo.


2:05 PM, November 30, 2005  
Blogger Alita Duplanty said...

Oh!! this picture have a very fun unbelievable pictures

6:50 AM, November 02, 2014  

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